17) "You will not poke, prod, tickle, or otherwise endanger the foot!"
(Strict orders to her co-author.)
40) "Your shoelace most certainly did not score!"
(A guy’s shoelace had been in her cleavage. It was a very cleavaged night.)
43) "I would’ve been screaming much louder if I’d actually been being stabbed to death, by a bread crumb or otherwise!"
(Um, there was a bread crumb in my bed, and well, it hurt. It attacked my foot.)
56) "They're my Achilles ankles."
(The funny thing is, she was talking about her knees.)
83) "My foot is eating my sock."
(The things you hear when walking by people . . .)
122) "Your feet are clean, right?"
"Are you kidding? I was just at work for eight hours!"
"Oh well, I didn't use my tongue, so it's okay."
(On biting feet ... or something.)
126) "I dunno . . . they're cute, but I could never wear them -- they're already making my feet throw up."
(Gee ... sorry about that ...)
127) "A shoehorn? For me? Wow!"
(Said without sarcasm. No, really.)
134) "Um, we have a problem. I'm falling out of my socks."
(And again, I hate it when that happens! I have come to the conclusion we have too many quotes on here about socks and feet. Stop it, people!)
174) "I don't wanna play footsie with a frog!"
(Well, she didn't.)
218) "My foot is flapping!"
(Is it supposed to do that?)
249)"Are your feet ticklish?"
"No, actually they're an errogenous zone."
"My hand feels dirty."
250) "Maybe I should tickle his feet again. That'll get him up!"
(Eek.)
274) "Were you plotting death to my ankles?"
(Yes.)
385) "Huh? My big toenail caused the rain?"
(Duh!)
485) "Hey, you, what are you -- no, get away! That's my...argh! She's trying to eat my leg!"
(Yes, this was the cat.)
532) "Wow. My foot is almost the same color as your wall."
(Umm ... congrats?)
590) "Ow, my hand! I mean, my foot ..."
(... does somebody need to go back to kindergarten?)
634) "I am happy because I am alive, and I have two working arms and two working legs and ten working digits on each limb ..."
(People on this list really need to go back to anatomy class.)